“Siete crudeli e ignoranti”: una mamma americana difende suo figlio e grida di averne abbastanza dalle colonne di un giornale del Vermont. Ha scritto una lettera dura e forte, che pone interrogativi importanti: QX ha deciso di pubblicarla integralmente.

La lettera che pubblichiamo è apparsa domenica 30 aprile sul Concord Monitor, un giornale del Vermont, lo stato degli Usa in cui è stata recentemente approvata una legge sulle unioni civili provocando la reazione violenta dei conservatori. Per non perdere

la forza delle parole usate dalla signora Underwood, consigliamo vivamente di leggere la lettera nella versione originale: crediamo sia un lieve sforzo che vale la pena fare. In ogni caso, per chi con l’inglese avesse grossi problemi, forniamo la traduzi

one italiana dei brani più significativi.

Ma prima di passare alla lettera di Mrs Underwood, che vive in un piccolo paese del Vermont, è necessario ricordare che per la festa della mamma la presidente dell’Associazione genitori di Omosessuali Paola

Dall’Orto grazie alla collaborazione dell’Arcigay di Siena ha diffuso una lettera alle mamme, pubblicata integralmente da NOI, nella quale coglieva l’occasione per invitare alla comprensione i genitori che scoprono l’omosomosessualità loro figlio e temon

o i pregiudizi sociali.

La lettera che adesso pubblichiamo è molto più cruda: attacca le famiglie dei moralisti e sbugiarda chi difende la famiglia in nome della religione, pone interrogativi importanti e può essere oggetto di discussione perfino

all’interno del movimento gay. Nega infatti che l’orientamento sessuale (etero ed omo) sia una scelta: ma proprio su questo fatto basa l’impossibilità e l’ingiustizia di ogni discriminazione.


As the mother of a gay son, I’ve seen firsthand how cruel and misguided people can be.

Many letters have been sent to the Valley News concerning the homosexual menace in Vermont. I am the mother of a ga

y son and I’ve taken enough from you good people. I’m tired of your foolish rhetoric about the “homosexual agenda” and your allegations that accepting homosexuality is the same thing as advocating sex with children. You are cruel and ignorant. You have be

en robbing me of the joys of motherhood ever since my children were tiny.

My firstborn son started suffering at the hands of the moral little thugs from your moral, upright families from the time he was in the first grade. He was physically and ve

rbally abused from first grade straight through high school because he was perceived to be gay.

He never professed to be gay or had any association with anything gay, but he had the misfortune not to walk or have gestures like the other boys. He wa

s called “fag” incessantly, starting when he was 6. In high school, while your children were doing what kids that age should be doing, mine labored over a suicide note, drafting and redrafting it to be sure his family knew how much he loved them. My sobb

ing 17-year-old tore the heart out of me as he choked out that he just couldn’t bear to continue living any longer, that he didn’t want to be gay and that he couldn’t face a life without dignity.

You have the audacity to talk about protecting famil

ies and children from the homosexual menace, while you yourselves tear apart families and drive children to despair. I don’t know why my son is gay, but I do know that God didn’t put him, and millions like him, on this Earth to give you someone to abuse.

God gave you brains so that you could think, and it’s about time you started doing that. At the core of all your misguided beliefs is the belief that this could never happen to you, that there is some kind of subculture out there that people have chosen t

o join. The fact is that if it can happen to my family, it can happen to yours, and you won’t get to choose. Whether it is genetic or whether something occurs during a critical time of fetal development, I don’t know. I can only tell you with an absolute

certainty that it is inborn.

If you want to tout your own morality, you’d best come up with something more substantive than your heterosexuality. You did nothing to earn it; it was given to you. If you disagree, I would be interested in hearing yo

ur story, because my own heterosexuality was a blessing I received with no effort whatsoever on my part. It is so woven into the very soul of me that nothing could ever change it. For those of you who reduce sexual orientation to a simple choice, a charac

ter issue, a bad habit or something that can be changed by a 12-step program, I’m puzzled. Are you saying that your own sexual orientation is nothing more than something you have chosen, that you could change it at will? If that’s not the case, then why w

ould you suggest that someone else can?

A popular theme in your letters is that Vermont has been infiltrated by outsiders. Both sides of my family have lived in Vermont for generations. I am heart and soul a Vermonter, so I’ll thank you to stop sa

ying that you are speaking for “true Vermonters.”

You invoke the memory of the brave people who have fought on the battlefield for this great country, saying that they didn’t give their lives so that the “homosexual agenda” could tear down the pri

nciples they died defending. My 83-year-old father fought in some of the most horrific battles of World War II, was wounded and awarded the Purple Heart. He shakes his head in sadness at the life his grandson has had to live. He says he fought alongside h

omosexuals in those battles, that they did their part and bothered no one. One of his best friends in the service was gay, and he never knew it until the end, and when he did find out, it mattered not at all. That wasn’t the measure of the man.


religious folk just can’t bear the thought that as my son emerges from the hell that was his childhood he might like to find a lifelong companion and have a measure of happiness. It offends your sensibilities that he should request the right to visit tha

t companion in the hospital, to make medical decisions for him or to benefit from tax laws governing inheritance.

How dare he? you say. These outrageous requests would threaten the very existence of your family, would undermine the sanctity of marr

iage. You use religion to abdicate your responsibility to be thinking human beings. There are vast numbers of religious people who find your attitudes repugnant. God is not for the privileged majority, and God knows my son has committed no sin.


deep-thinking author of a letter to the April 12 Valley News who lectures about homosexual sin and tells us about “those of us who have been blessed with the benefits of a religious upbringing” asks: “What ever happened to the idea of striving to be bett

er uman beings than we are?”

Indeed, sir, what ever happened to that?

Qui per la traduzione in italiano…